Choosing Sunshine

I was hoping Tuesday would bring with it a better day than Monday, but no such luck. My day at work went somewhere along the lines of:

The other nurse I was working with asked if I could "hold down the fort" while she ran an errand for an hour. I was nervous about being alone with 36 patients but it's only an hour, right? Bad choice. The second she left all hell broke loose. One patient started bleeding profusely, I assumed from her rectum (probably internal bleeding) since she was like 80 years old, but I wasn't about to lift up her dress and check. As I was preparing her for the hypotensive shock that always comes with extreme bleeding and delegating a technician to call 911, another patient decided this would be the perfect time to have a heart attack! Yep, seriously. I started bouncing back and forth between the bleeding and the CPR when another patient suddenly went into respiratory arrest because he has asthma and forgot his inhaler! I'm not sure what caused the sudden asthma attack but I have a sneaking suspicion it was from observing the crazy scene in front of him... Now I had three people dying. Wonderful. I was in Charge Nurse mode. Barking out orders, cussing at the coworkers who had gone into shock and had become completely useless, while simultaneously praying to God to not let anyone die on my watch. The cherry on top was when one of the onlookers started projectile vomiting ALL OVER US. Believe it.

I am happy to report that by the end of that shift, NOBODY DIED! Praise Jesus!!! However, that wasn't the end of the insanity. As I walked in the door Austin came running up to me excitedly, holding the handle that had apparently been ripped off the refrigerator door yelling, "Mommy LOOK!!" Great, one more thing to fix. The rest of the night was a blur of extended family drama, listening to my husband who had also had a VERY bad day at work, and cleaning up the giant cup of chocolate milk that Eve had somehow gotten ahold of and dumped all over the stairs. Austin asked if he could play in the closet under the stairs and I was so happy to get rid of him that I actually said yes! I knew there was a good chance he would completely demolish everything that is stored in there but at that moment, I would do anything for a moment of silence..... Oh did I pay for that one..... After cleaning up yet another insane mess, I officially called it bed time at 6:30pm because both Mom and Dad were about to lose it.

I woke up this morning scared of what the day had in store for us. I wasn't sure if it could get any worse than Monday and Tuesday but I really didn't feel like finding out. As I was contemplating staying in bed all day and letting my kids fend for themselves, Austin started begging for a bagel and Eve started crying due to a foul odor coming from her diaper and I realized that I was just going to have to pick another day to give up and die.

Instead, I chose sunshine.

I chose to pick my tired butt up and take my babies to dance class. We hadn't been in almost a year because Austin was going through his "dark time". A time when he was scared of everyone and got anxiety from loud noise and music. Times have changed though and our little man was having a great time this morning! He and Little Miss were so stinking cute as they tried copying the dance moves along with the teacher, Miss Katie :). It was a giant plus that my best friend and her little girl showed up as well! With all the music and dancing we didn't get much of a chance to talk so we decided to take the party over to the park!

Miss Katie had all sorts of fun, silly props to dance with!

We stopped at Wendy's to pick up lunch, and had ourselves a picnic at the park! The water is officially on now at the splash pads so we took all the clothes off of the kids and let them run around in their diapers, wild and free with reckless abandon, while we got a chance to talk in between chasing after them :).

Chubby Naky Baby! AHHHH!!!! I'm dying from cuteness here!

As I hugged my sweet friend and watched our beautiful babies play in the water, I noticed the sunshine. So warm and so peaceful. It was like a hug from heaven telling me to enjoy. And boy, did we ever! So much fun, in fact, that the kids passed out in the car only minutes into the drive home. I quietly listened to music and happily reflected on what a successful day it had been in the fun department and laughed while giving myself a pat on the back because Eve only ate one cigarette butt today and only took a drink from a random strangers water twice.... hahaha.
 

Sometimes you just have to pull yourself out of bed and choose sunshine.

Such a Monday......

Shoot me now, please.

Wow, it's only 12:30 in the afternoon and I'm already feeling the need to cuddle up with a tub of ice cream and watch Gilmore Girls.... I wasn't planning on blogging today, but the current need to vent right now is strong! Plus, I have a minute or two while the kids are watching Little Einsteins, my goal with that being, when the reporter puts his microphone in my face 15 years down the road and asks how I feel about being the mother of two bank robbers, I can proudly say, "Yeah, but just look at how intelligent they are! That's not the work of a common idiot off the street...." (insert sarcasm here)

This crappy day began at 5:30am. Like clock work, Austin came into our room, slamming doors behind him. I jumped out of bed and begged him to go downstairs and quietly play with his toys so the rest of us could sleep, and PLEEAASSSEE don't wake the baby!! Yeah, I know, plea bargaining with a two year old....did I really think he would listen? No. I was just hoping maybe this morning the Gods were with us. No such luck.

He continued being noisy, and I continued threatening, until 6am when our super loud security alarm went off. Apparently my sister had forgotten which day it is and thought she was supposed to babysit for me while I worked. Nope, that would be tomorrow. (insert crying baby now)

Since we had three hours to kill until it was time to hit the gym, we did chores and played with Wally, our vacuuming robot. I wrote out a congratulations card to my cousin who is graduating from High School and planned on sending it off on our way out. It was as I was dropping the card into the Outgoing Mail slot that I realized I had completely forgotten to put a stamp on it! There was money in that card! So hopefully it finds its way back to us someday, or I just gave the Mailman an early Birthday present....

I soldiered on with perfect faith that all would be right in the world again if I could just get on that treadmill. It was 30 minutes into my run when I got the ever dreaded tap on the shoulder. The daycare teacher was there to tell me my son was having a melt down....GRRrrrrrr!!!

I held him until the crying stopped and then tried to get him to tell me what had happened. All he could come up with was he was just feeling sad today. Since there didn't seem to be any damage done, I again started with the plea bargaining... "Please Austin! Just 30 more minutes! Just give me 30 more minutes!!" I almost had him back in the game when the teacher informed me that Evelyne had pooped her diaper. Apparently it just wasn't in the cards, so I gave up. Onward troops! Off to the next thing on our list! Grocery shopping.....

Call me a fool, I wouldn't blame you. Yes, despite all the bad karma coming our way, I attempted grocery shopping.

It was a nightmare. I was holding back the tears while my son screamed for a hot dog and my baby cried because she couldn't shove my entire iPod into her mouth. A charming fellow shopper in front of me informed me that my children must be hungry. I laughed hysterically. It's official, I've gone insane.

We got the hot dog and I raced out of the building as fast as possible, but not before grabbing 32 ounces of Diet Dr. Pepper. Mommy fuel, insanity serum, whatever you want to call it, I was going to have it!

After the groceries were loaded and the kids were buckled, I handed Austin his hot dog. "NOOOO!!! I don't want a hot dog!!!" he protested. "Oh Lord, someone help me!" I literally yelled in the parking lot in front of everyone. Turns out he just wanted the hot dog bun, not the hot dog. I peeled out of the parking lot with a sad, lonely hot dog by my side, while my kids happily snacked on the bun that once encased it.

To top off this no good, very bad day, they both fell asleep within minutes. Yep, just an hour before my much beloved nap time, my kids decided to pass out in the car. Since it would be a good 15 minutes before we reached home, they would receive the perfect power nap to keep them up the rest of the afternoon, leaving me with no break whatsoever. Sorry Mom, maybe next time....

This was going to be the week of extreme dieting, but after this realization, I took a look at that poor, defeated hot dog in the passenger seat and I ate it like there was no tomorrow; occasionally stopping to guzzle some Diet Doctor Pepper in between breaths.

Then, as I was unloading groceries and carrying my sleeping monsters into the house, Austin wrapped his tiny arms around my neck and sleepily whispered, "I yuv you Mommy....".

Game Changer.

Dang it, I was REALLY hoping to continue regretting his existence for the rest of the day. How is it possible to hate someone so much one minute, and then absolutely fall head over heels in love with him the next??? Four simple words and I am putty in his hands.

Reminds me of a quote from Johnny Depp:

"Breathe. It’s only a bad day, not a bad life.”

Saturday Snapshot II

 

Kicking Saturday off right with churros and Starbucks for breakfast! 

One churro for you, two for me... ;).

Eve had fun wandering around, talking to the locals and making friends with Lola, the giant sheep dog.

We had to keep rounding up the little social butterfly.... She didn't appreciate that vey much and kept sneakily plotting her escape to go feed the dog again :).

 

We followed it up with a walk down the trail behind our house, Austin pushing the stroller and Eve happily snacking on her churro as we went :). Not a care in the world.... 

LIFE IS GOOD! 

Austin



Look at that sweet face... so innocent and cute! I wish moment-freezing were possible because this is one of those I would definitely want to freeze in time!

The tantrums, the melt downs, oh Lord help us!!

This is such an interesting time. Austin is trying to find his independence and prove to us that he can do everything we can do. We hear, "Stop!! Austin do it!!" All. Day. Long.... I try hard to swallow my impatience and let him have his way because I know this is an important developmental stage and I don't want to impede his learning. But by night time I am so over it! The other night I tucked him into bed and turned out the light, whispering "I love you" as I quietly closed the door. Instantaneously I was met with screaming, crying, and flailing on the ground. Why, you ask? Because I turned the light off and "Austin do that"....... Grrrrr!! 

I was over it. It was time for the little monster to go to bed, and so help me, I was not going to cave! I showered, got ready for bed, and an hour later he was still screaming. But now it was louder and far more irritating. Oh, and the baby was awake and crying now too! 

I had HAD IT! I barged into his room, pulled him up off the floor, lifted him to the light switch, yelled at him to turn it off, and put him back to bed..... this time without the sweet "I love you" as I slammed the door shut. 

And believe it or not, he went right to sleep! No questions asked! I climbed into bed completely incredulous of what had just happened, on the verge of tears myself.... I wasn't proud of my actions, but everybody snaps sometimes.

When I'm not dealing with Tantrum-Man, I am having the greatest time with the sweetest kid! It's like he's bipolar! For example, we had the greatest morning! I woke up bright and early to Austin standing right by my bed, staring at me two inches away from my face. After getting ready we went to the store to pick out fruit to bring to cooking class because today was fruit pizza day! Austin happily pushed his mini-shopping cart around and picked out a strawberry milk to go along with his blackberries and then we headed over to Starbucks to get Mom a drink as well. Austin was so proud of himself as he ran into class with his blackberries, telling Ms. Tawanda he picked them out all by himself! He laughed and sang, and had himself TWO helpings of fruit pizza! We were having such a great day and topped it off with a car wash because Austin LOOOVES the car wash! 

In awe as we were getting our car washed!

 

I remember the days when the car wash scared the living daylights out of him! Now it is one of his most favorite things to do!

Then, just in time for naps, Tantrum-Man reared his ugly head, but this time I really have no idea why. This one lasted about 45 minutes before he finally passed out next to the door he had been screaming under....

Let's all take a moment of silence to feel bad for poor Evelyne during all this! The poor girl has been sleeping terribly because of all the noise! :(

Basically it has been an emotional roller coaster around here. We have to keep reminding ourselves that they don't call it the terrible two's for nothing. It kinda makes you feel better when you know the insanity is normal....

Overcast Days, Pancakes, and STUPID

Our little blue eyed alarm clock came running into our room at 5:50am, bright eyed and ready for the day! Mom and Dad, however, were not so ready. Austin laid at the foot of our bed for a good 10 minutes until Josh's alarm went off and then I proceeded to ignore him for as long as I could until he had brought every single car he owns into bed with us.

After Dad left for work, I realized resistance was futile and crawled out of bed.

It is overcast outside today with the scent of rain in the air! We opened all the windows to welcome in the cool weather and lit a candle. Days like these are all about comfort. Days like these require PANCAKES!!! 

I love days like these. Nowhere to go, and nothing to do. Rainy days don't come around much in the desert so you can bet we will be spending the rest of this one outside!! 

Now onto Stupid......

Austin has a favorite word, and it is driving me CRAAAAZZZZYYY!!! Everything is stupid. Everyone is stupid. Sometimes stupid is just stupid. Stupid, Stupid, STUPID!!! 

We've tried everything. We were told to ignore him so he won't think it is a word that gets him attention. Yeah, that didn't work. We then resorted to spanking, yelling, basically putting the fear of God into his little soul. Yeah, that didn't work either. We've tried coming up with "better words" that are silly and more fun to say! Nope, sorry Mom and Dad, not falling for that one! 

Now that I can't stand this word, I hear it everywhere! It's no wonder he finds it so intriguing! It's in every children's movie, Disney, Peanuts, you name it! I even use it constantly, or at least I did until it became the bane of my existence. Austin is now allowed to spank Josh and I if he hears us use it, which he loves by the way :). 

I know there are far worse words to use, and yes, we have heard him mutter a few of those already.... Hence the many phone calls I've made to family members to watch their tongues, the rules on which video games are allowed, and the stricter guidelines for TV shows. Nothing made me cringe more than hearing my baby boy say, "Dad, give me a Fu**ing crayon!!" And I am prepared to do anything I have to do to keep that from happening again. Luckily it seems to have worked! So why can't I get rid of Stupid??? 

I am convinced that Austin was sent to me specifically because he is my match in brains and power of will. His entire 2.5 years of life have been a constant series of power struggles and I have never met ANYONE who can bring out the crazy in me that he delights in. Because of this, every day brings a new lesson for the both of us.

Sundays Are For.....

Sundays are for wild hair, and clothing optional.

 

Sundays are for baking cupcakes for no reason at all.

 

Sundays are for cuddling with a VERY tired baby who is also cutting two new teeth, while Daddy and brother go to church. We were planning on going too I promise! But it doesn't matter what time we go to bed, these kids are up with the sun... I even tried asking Austin to go back to bed and his response was, "But the sun is awake!!"

 

 

 

Sundays are for BBQ's and lounging around on the patio furniture while the kids play who can get dirty the fastest.

 

 

 

Have I mentioned how much I love Sundays?!!

 

Saturday Snapshot I

Despite how dramatic Little Miss is making it look, we had a great day! We spent the morning at the gym, and had a fun date night in the evening! Our ward was doing a fundraiser for girls & scout camp by hosting a fancy date night with babysitting included! The youth and their leaders did a fantastic job decorating. It looked like a wedding reception! Josh and I enjoyed a delicious meal prepared by Chef Valdivioso while the kids had a pizza/pajama party in the nursery! I was worried about how well Eve would do because I've never left her in the nursery before with older children but the report was she did great! Both kids were super wound up by the end of the night from all the fun and we didn't make it to bed until late... Seriously, they would NOT give in and go to sleep!! But it was well worth the lack of sleep to have some fun and adult interaction! :)

 

Austin is obsessed with being the one who takes the picture... Evie and I didn't want to be in it anyway ;).

My whole heart and soul lies within these three humans.

 

Happy Saturday all!!!

LaFeber Life Lately

Busy Busy Busy! That would be us! That's how we like it though. Or how the kids and I like it. Josh prefers to sit at home and do nothing every chance he gets but then he always has fun and tells me thank you later :).

 

What we've been up to lately:

-Josh-

He has been doing great at work! He seriously makes us so proud! Working for Wells Fargo has been the perfect job for him and he is surpassing even his manager's expectations :). He has only been working there for a year now and is currently the #2 Consumer Loan Underwriter in the entire company! That means out of every loan underwriter in the entire United States (working for Wells Fargo) he is the second best! He would prefer to be #1 but it sounds like the lady who holds that title is insanely good at what she does and it would be almost impossible to top her.

When he isn't working he is playing with the kids, helping around the house (laundry is his specialty), or playing video games. He has started ordering old school games from his childhood and is like a kid in a candy store every time he plays them! Austin has fun playing too but is just a little too young to focus for very long. So he kinda pops in and out to see what Dad is up to and then goes back to playing with his cars or harassing his little sister.

Sword fighting with Austin.

Monday night smack down at the LaFeber household!

Playing video games.

-Ashly-

 I've been having fun working on myself through yoga and the gym. The kids have started going to the gym daycare which gives me a couple hours of quiet time and I LOVE IT! I've been trying to follow a low-carb diet but have been seriously struggling with it. I can't help it, I LOVE SUGAR!!

 

I am obsessed with inversion poses! I have been working on my upper body strength so I can convert into pincha without falling over every time....

Evie coming for the camera...

I love this girl! I also love being able to stay at home 5 out of the 7 days of the week and relax with my family like this without a care in the world.

Work is going well! My boss told me I'm the best nurse we've got and I have been in high demand from the other managers who are constantly asking for me to come fill in at their clinics, which was really nice to hear :). I'm currently working twice a week which works perfectly for our family. It gets me out of the house and provides some extra spending money :).

I decided to not pursue Nurse Practitioner School. I was so positive it would all work out until random events/moments kept happening and I started realizing there was no way I could leave my family in the lurch right now. So much rides on me to keep this family going and to keep things in order, not to mention my kids already give me a hard time if I'm not paying attention to them 24/7! I started having panic attacks about how it would be to be fighting the kids to take naps while simultaneously trying to memorize advanced pharmacology. Josh left the decision up to me because he knew how important it was to me to further my education, but in the end, the Mommy guilt won. After I made the decision, I went through a dark time. A depression. It was so frustrating that I couldn't do something for myself that was so important to me because I would never be able to forgive myself if it damaged my children in any way. After a couple months I pushed past it though and decided to focus on other ways of self improvement (hence the exercising, blogging, gardening, etc.). By the way, our garden is looking great! We love sitting on our front porch in our little oasis the kids and I created :). I came to the conclusion that there is a time and season for everything and right now is my time to live in the moment and to not worry about the future. Right now I need to cherish the hours with my babies as I try to teach them through experiences like cooking and gardening, or reading books and bath time. Graduate school can wait.

Have I mentioned how much we love being outdoors?

We have tomatoes people!!

Searching for tomatoes and learning how to count as he goes!

-Austin and Evelyne-

They started their first swimming lessons this month! I signed them up for a parent and me class and we have loved it! Each of us take a kid and have a great time! So far we have learned how to blow bubbles, float on our backs, jump off the wall into the water, and how to doggy paddle :). Yesterday Austin learned how to put his face under the water (We didn't want to traumatize Eve so we let her skip this one)! I wasn't sure if he would actually do it, but he did! And he was so proud of himself! To anyone who doesn't have kids, these little feats would sound so stupid, but they are HUGE to us!

 

Walking like a champ!

 

 

Eating scrambled eggs, his favorite food!

Austin is also a big fan of jumping on Mom and Dad's bed :).

It is so rare that they fall asleep in the car at the same time! Usually Eve falls asleep and then Austin screams and yells at her until she wakes up....grrrr!

But I can never stay mad at him for long. How can you be mad at face?!

 

Playing around at the Multigenerational Center while we wait for swimming lessons to start!

Pulling Evie's hair, as always...

Jumping off rocks like a total boy.

 

She is pure perfection and that adorable swimsuit is the cherry on top!