Milestones: 1 Month

Austin is seriously the perfect baby. He only cries when he wants to be held or when he's hungry. He is super cuddly and loves to make eye contact and hold my finger while he is nursing... it melts my heart. It's hard to believe he is already 1 month old. It seems like yesterday when we were in the hospital, awe-ing and coo-ing over how adorable he was.

1 Month Milestones: 

Over the past month, his sleeping habits have gotten much easier to work with. In the beginning he kept me up all night and cried any time I tried to put him down. That meant I spent many a night sleeping in a chair or falling asleep in bed with him laying on my chest. He now wakes up 3 times per night (give or take) and goes right back to sleep in his bassinet after he eats and has a clean diaper. 

Taking a mid-morning nap (2 weeks old) after he kept me up all night

Daddy has also gotten the "opportunity" to take care of him a few times at night and feed him a bottle. I was so scared at first to allow this because of course, nobody can take care of my baby as well as I can. But Josh has proven himself and actually did a really great job! Austin did really great with the bottle as well. He hates pacifiers and starts gagging every time we try to use them so I was afraid he wouldn't take a bottle, but after a little coaxing he did just fine. 

I was even able to leave the two of them and get my hair done a couple of days ago which was really nice because between the summer heat and having no time to take care of myself, shorter hair is wonderful!

We moved into our new house two weeks after he was born and the unpacking process was fairly difficult since Josh was working lots of overtime and I had a brand new baby who was constantly wanting to be held. So in came the baby carrier! He spent the whole day in it while I unpacked the kitchen which was a Godsend because he slept most of the time. However, I paid for it later with lots of back and stomach pain from my C-section. This made the discovery of the swing an even bigger Godsend! He loves his swing and we love watching him in it because he tries so hard to focus on things while he is swinging but it just makes him dizzy and then he falls asleep. It's pretty cute :). 

We took him to church for the first time last Sunday. He slept all through sacrament and then got really fussy after that so we took him home. We bought him this adorable FAO Schwarz suit before he was born and have been dying to put it on him but it is still on the big side so we had to roll up the pant legs and sleeves. He still looked like a little stud muffin!

Our community has a pool that we had a blast exploring for the first time with the baby and my sister Briana! He didn't know what to think and at first he cried a little bit. But then, just like at bath time, he decided to give in and sit there calmly while we laughed and splashed for him. We got these adorable baby sunglasses from the Utah baby shower and he looked so stinking cute for the 5 minutes that he actually wore them. He kept rolling his head around, trying to knock them off since he hasn't mastered the art of using his hands yet. 

  

We have had LOTS of visitors, aka: Austin admirers. My sisters absolutely adore him and love to come over and cuddle with him. My best friend Jura and her husband also came over the other night with dinner. We had a great time catching up with them and they seemed to have fun playing with Austin. He's not super interactive yet, but he is sure dang fun to hold and look at! 

Auntie Sadie

Auntie Briana

Auntie Jura

Cousin Naomi

Great Grandma Helm

I have been taking morning walks with Austin in his stroller and despite it being 100 degrees at 9:00 in the morning, it has been really nice! The weather was much better when we went after his 5:00am feeding but I haven't found the energy to do that again. He sleeps most of the time, but when he is awake, he likes looking around and taking in the scenery.

Yesterday, Austin and I met up with my Mom and Briana at the mall to do some school shopping. Basically Briana and her friends went off to shop and my mom and I wandered around eating pretzel bites with the baby. It was really fun and we got a lot of attention from little kindergarten girls who asked if they could "look at my baby" and other moms who were also pushing around their little bundles of joy. Austin did great and seemed in awe of his surroundings. He even missed his afternoon nap because he was too entertained to fall asleep! My mom couldn't resist the baby stores and he made off with some super cute clothes from the Baby Gap :). Oh how nice it must be to be that cute!

Our New Home!

The moment we have long been waiting for finally arrived this last weekend! We moved into our first house! It was so much fun getting to design everything and even more fun getting to see the final product! Everything turned out beautifully and we couldn't be happier.

This was us after the big move in. We were so exhausted but so happy! We just had a new baby 2 weeks prior to this big event and neither of us have been getting much sleep. To add to that, Josh has been working a ton of overtime lately and hasn't had much of a break at work. So to add moving to this crazy list was rough, but we had so much help from my parents and we even cheated and hired movers to do most of the work for us ;).

My Step-Dad has been teaching Josh a thing or two about "manly things" which included installing our washer/dryer, and on Saturday they will be installing all of our ceiling fans (it was way cheaper to do it ourselves). Meanwhile, my Mom, Grandma W., and I watched the baby and started unpacking some of our things.

 "We may not have it all together, but together we have it all." We have been so blessed over the past 6 months and have so many people to thank. It hasn't always been easy living like nomads but it was an experience we will never forget and it has helped us realize how much we truly have to be grateful for. We will never take for granted how special it is to have a family who would do anything for you. Nor will we ever take for granted the amazing feeling of having our own space again and being surrounded by all of our stuff (or junk as Josh fondly calls it). Life is good!

Austin Joshua LaFeber

Introductions:

Meet Austin! He is the sweetest baby and he loves to be cuddled. His favorite pastimes are eating, sleeping, and pooping and he does each of those so well! His eyes are cobalt blue, and his hair is a toffee color but it is starting to go blonde around his temples so we are thinking he is going to be a blondie like his momma! He was born on July 15, 2013 and weighed 7lbs 15 oz, 20 1/2 inches long. He is such a relaxed baby and does more grunting and squeeking like a mouse than he does crying. He is still working on the whole sleeping through the night thing and hopefully he figures it out soon because Mom and Dad are beyond tired! Besides that though, we have no complaints and he truly is the perfect baby. I only wish he could stay just like this forever and never grow up. He is such a momma's boy and wants to be around me constantly. He freaks out if he figures out I'm not there (like every night when I try to take a shower) which is precious to me but probably not so much to everyone else who tries to take care of him for me. It will be very interesting (and sad) to see how he handles me going back to work. 

His Birth Story

To make a long story short, I wasn't progressing at all (zero dilation, zero braxton hicks contractions, etc) so the doctor told me I would have to be induced and it would be best to do the induction earlier rather than later before the baby got too big or started having problems. So, we went to the hospital Saturday July 13th to have our baby (I was 39 weeks along). We had originally planned on having him at the St. Rose Siena Hospital but they were having an overflow of patients that day and they cancelled us without even bothering to call us....that was a nice little surprise. So we transferred over to the St. Rose San Martin Hospital and luckily they were having an extremely slow day and were much nicer than the folks over at Siena. By 2:00pm we started the induction process which sadly turned into a 3 day torture event. The medicine they used to start dilation, instead caused my uterus to start contracting. And we aren't talking about minor contractions here.... we're talking off the charts contractions that were occuring every minute (and sometimes even less than that) and my cervix was still not dilating. On the second day of this, the nurse came in and told me they were sending me home because the induction wasn't working. I was starting to freak out because I was having contractions every minute and I really didn't want to risk being at home if I suddenly had this baby! So during this serious moment of anxiety, God granted me some mercy and caused my water to break. The nurse thought I was lying at first out of some desperate attempt to not have to go home, but then the gushing started and it was very obvious that I was not peeing myself. 

Once my water broke, I learned the true meaning of pain. The contractions that had once felt pretty bad, now felt like a thousand stabbing knives, and if I moved at all, it only got worse. So there I was, having contractions that were so strong they were registering above 12 on the monitor every 30 seconds to 1 minute and my cervix wasn't doing a dang thing! I wanted to die. In  my head I was trying to come up with plans of escape and I remember even thinking about how this wasn't worth it and I didn't want this baby anymore. But there was no escaping it. I was stuck. I was forced to stay in bed by both the nurses, and by the horrific pain that was torturing my body. I hadn't eaten or drank anything in days due to hospital policy. I finally got the nurse to cave in and give me some dextrose in my IV to give me some energy because, as you can imagine, days of no food makes you pretty tired. Both Josh and Sadie were there the whole time and they both felt totally helpless. I was so grateful they were there for support but at the same time, that's about all they could do!

Josh hanging out and watching TV since there wasn't much else he could do to help the situation. Yes, I was jealous...

Then, at the end of day 2, my saving grace came.... the epidural. The nurse felt so bad for me that she talked the anesthesiologist into giving me an epidural when I reached 3cm of dilation (and that was with her manually using her fingers to dilate me that far). Normally, they won't give it to you until 4cm but since my cervix had a mind of its own, I was made the "special case." Life got much better from there. I was immediately thanking and praising the anesthesiologist like he was some sort of God, and to me at that moment, he was. Now that the pain was gone, I was me again.... not some moaning, crying, cussing, crazy person. I was able to talk again and chew on my ice chips in a pathetic attempt to keep the dry mouth at bay.  

At 1:00am on the third day, the moment I had been dreading came and the nurse told us they wanted to do a C-Section because nothing was happening with my cervix. I was so mad at my body for doing this to me! Nobody wants to go through surgery, and especially after you had worked so hard for days to keep that from happening! So I begged the nurse to give me until 6am and if nothing had happened by then, we would do the C-Section. Over the next 5 hours Josh and I prayed and prayed. I also did every possible thing I could think of to make the progression happen. I was exhausted. I was now going on day 3 of zero sleep, and zero food/water. I'm not lying when I say that mentally, emotionally, and physically I was over it. So when the nurse came in at 6am to check me and informed me that not only had I DEGRESSED instead of progressed, but the baby had also changed positions and was no longer head down anymore, I calmly told her to schedule the C-Section and in my head I didn't care anymore. 

So they wheeled me into the operating room with Josh right behind us putting on his scrubs and mask. In the O.R. I was strapped to a table and given plenty of drugs to paralyze me from the chest down. I was numb on the outside, but on the inside I was panicking. I've never been through a surgery before, and especially never one that was totally unplanned. My mind was racing with thoughts like, "What if the drugs don't work and I feel them cutting into me?!" So, of course the tears started and pretty soon I was crying uncontrollably. "How could this happen?" I was thinking. I did everything right! I followed all the rules, I kept myself fit and read plenty of books. I even prayed!!! So why was I now strapped to a table with a big blue sheet in front of me keeping me from seeing the two doctors who were currently cutting me open?! Josh held my hand and kept trying to console me but I was so far from being consolable. Then the intense chest pain came. The anesthesiologist said it was from the pressure of the gas the doctors were using, pushing up against my chest and she gave me some more pain meds that took a couple of minutes to kick in. I thought I was having a heart attack which didn't help my anxiety at all and then suddenly, once the pain went away, the nausea and dry heaving kicked in. So in came more drugs. The doctor asked Josh if he wanted to stand up and watch them pull out the baby (I was so jealous) and the next thing I knew, I was hearing my son cry. It was the sweetest moment of my life. I couldn't see him, or hold him, but I could hear him and that was a sound I hope I will forever remember. Josh helped the nurse cut the cord, and clean him off, and then they brought him over to my head (my arms were still strapped down) so I could kiss him and look at our new beautiful creation. Then, they took him away with Josh right beside him the entire time and proceeded to sew my body back together.

I was so exhaused and high on drugs that the rest of the day is slightly blurry and I remember having an extremely hard time keeping my eyes from going cross-eyed when I tried to focus on people who were talking to me. They wheeled me into my room where Josh and the baby were waiting for me and proceeded to give me my baby. He was like a soft piece of heaven and he smelled so good! He took to breastfeeding immediately and I spent the rest of the day/night with him in my arms just gazing awestruck at how perfect he was. Josh went out into the waiting room to tell all 50 of our visitors that Austin had arrived! They all came in excitedly and I had such a fun time watching them hold him and love on him until the nurse kicked everyone out because there were too many people there. We stayed for two more days after that, making a total of 5 days spent in the hospital. Over those next two days we rested, had visitors, and had a beautiful time getting to know our new son.

The experience of bringing our son into the world wasn't perfect, and I won't lie and say that I am excited to do it again anytime soon. But the experience of lying in the hospital bed together as a family and laughing excitedly about all the funny faces Austin was making made the memory of all that pain melt away. He had us spellbound and we officially knew what it meant to be in love. 

The C-Section.....Doctor Samantha Schoenhaus pulling him out of my stomach.

The doctor put him up over the curtain after she pulled him out of my stomach so I could see him!

Daddy cutting the umbilical cord!

Getting cleaned off.

Not happy about getting wiped down. His face was so swollen!

Daddy standing by Mommy and holding my hand while I cried.

Getting weighed and measured.

All clean and waiting for Mommy to come to come out of surgery to hold him!

Holding my baby for the first time!

I looked terrible in these pictures but this moment was so precious!

My life felt complete! It was all worth it at this moment!

Daddy coming over to be a part of it :).

Our first family picture! Don't judge me, I was so swollen and tired!!

I couldn't get enough of him! He was so beautiful!

Austin's new entourage. Can you say spoiled?!

Josh was such a proud Daddy. It was so sweet to see how excited he was to show off his son to everyone.

This is one of those silly faces I was talking about. He is such a funny baby!

First day home! We were discharged at midnight so we were ALL tired! Poor Daddy had to go to work today too :(.

But baby boy and I got to stay in bed and snuggle! I'm so in love with this sweet little boy!

Currently:

Austin is three weeks old now and grows more adorable by the minute. We can't get enough of his big blue eyes, the little mouse squeeks he makes, or his adorable double chin. We are having so much fun learning how to be a family of three and each day both Austin and I can't wait for 5 o'clock to roll around so Daddy can come home and spend time with us! Josh and I both feel like we are two totally different people now... it's funny how that happens. We can't wait to see what the future has in store for all of us and what the next adventure will be!

4 days old, having just come home from his first doctors visit

He had mild jaundice so we had to put him in his diaper and give  him a little sun exposure. It was so funny every time we took him outside because in seconds he would suddenly become limp like a rag doll and fall asleep.

At 2 weeks he was the typical newborn. He slept most of the day, stayed up most of the night, and loved to eat and poop.

We gave him his first bath at the end of the second week when his umbilical cord finally fell off. He loved it and acted so relaxed the entire time. 

At 3 weeks he loves to be held and doesn't react very well when you try to set him down. So I tried out the baby carrier and he loved it! He got to be right there by my side the whole day while I unpacked our house and even fell asleep in it. 

Waiting and Day-Dreaming

Waiting. It's the hardest thing for me to do. I find myself always getting frustrated with life because I don't want to wait anymore! So in the midst of this frustration, I day-dream...

What is it I day-dream about? 

It's funny because my dreams haven't changed much since I was a little girl. I used to come home from school and sit on our front porch swing (when we lived in Utah) and spend hours swinging back and forth, while day-dreaming about my future and what it might hold for me. Of course there was always the handsome man with the great career and the beautiful house full of beautiful children. And in my dreams I was always happy. 

Today, I'm dreaming about our house. 

-I want so badly to have our own home again! 

-I want to cook and bake whenever the mood strikes me without having to ask permission, or ask where things are. 

-I want to "nest" and put together our little boys room so that it will feel more real that he is actually going to be here soon. 

-I want to have access to the internet again without having to go to the library, or use my cell phone. 

-I want to have privacy and not have to tell people where I am going all the time and when I will be home.

-I want to have control over the TV so I can watch what interests me, and not have to worry about it being interesting to other people. 

-I want to be able to practice yoga in my living room without someone watching me and laughing at how ridiculous some of the poses are.

-Basically, I just want a place I can call my own, so I can be myself. 

***The projected completion date of our house is July 31st, and then we will probably be able to move in a week after that. So I have a little over a month of day-dreaming before this dream becomes a reality. Time can't move any faster!!!  

This is what our house looked like a week ago when I met up with the building supervisor to go over the building plans and layout that we wanted. Since then, we were told that they put in all the insulation and will be doing the dry wall next!

  

I'm also dreaming about our baby.

-I can't wait to hold him, cuddle with him, and breathe in that sweet scent of a newborn. 

-I am excited to put our awesome new stroller to good use and go on lots of walks/runs with him! 

-I am soooooo excited for the holidays so we can experience those with him for the first time!

-In my dreams our baby has hair, and lots of it! So of course I will be styling his hair and dressing him in all sorts of adorable little man outfits all day long!

The only damper I've been feeling about this dream is that I will be a full time working mom.... That was never a part of the dream, and it bothers me a lot. Why did the economy have to crash? Why can't it be like the 1950's when Dads went to work and Moms stayed home with the kids and got together with the neighborhood ladies every Wednesday afternoon for the weekly card game? I envy our Grandparents and the simple lives they led. 

But then again, would I be willing to give up all of our vacations? Or how about all of our fun date nights, Sonic runs for their amazing Vanilla-CokeZero's, dinners out, pedicures, and shopping sprees (once I can actually fit into normal clothes again)? Or what about the house we are currently building? When I think about it that way, I remember why I work. Basically it's because I want it all and that kind of lifestyle takes $$$.  

 So basically I just need to be more patient. Come mid-July, our angel will be here and about two weeks after that our house will be finished. Then we can move in, set up the nursery, and I will finally have my kitchen back along with all the privacy, yoga, and stroller walks/runs I could ever ask for!

Not a bad dream :).

 

  

 

Baby News ~ 37 Weeks (THE FINAL MONTH!!!!)

It's the last leg of the race and the end is in sight!

Remember how I mentioned that I am scared to death of labor/delivery? Well, I'm at the point now where even that doesn't sound too bad if it means I can get this pregnancy over with! It is an extremely uncomfortable feeling being 3X your normal size. I can't eat very much because there is no room for the food to go anywhere so I end up waking up in the middle of the night to throw up. The heat has been a KILLER and that too makes me nauseous, swollen, and lightheaded. It hurts to walk, it hurts to sit....and when I try to lie down I can't breathe! So yes, I am at that point where I will go through the pain if I can just feel normal again!!

At 37 Weeks I Am:

Craving- fruits and chocolate. The fridge is packed with strawberries, apples, grapes, nectarines, peaches, lemons, grapefruit, and plums at the moment and every Friday I go back to the farmer's market for more! I'm trying to eat more of the healthy stuff than the chocolate but I won't lie and say that I am trying very hard ;).

Feeling- Exhausted, hot (in the non-sexy sense of the word), and excited to meet our baby boy very soon! We can't wait to hold him and love him, and hopefully he will be a good baby and feel the same way about us. With how hard working has become, I'm really hoping the baby comes early. I have been getting really swollen in my hands, legs, and feet. The other day when I took off the compression socks I wear while I work, my knees were literally the size of grapefruits! I have also been having trouble with low blood pressure. My normal blood pressure and heart rate are always low, but now that I am pregnant it has gotten to the extremely low category which puts the baby at risk for not getting enough oxygen. I know, normally pregnant women have the opposite problem. So the bright side of this situation is that my doctor wrote a note to my boss saying I'm not allowed to work overtime, on call, or graveyard shifts until the baby comes! Yay!!!

Loving: Not a whole lot right now (sorry this is such a negative post). However, I HAVE loved getting the final baby shopping done! I took inventory of everything we got at the baby showers and everything we are missing, and then went on a shopping spree with all the gift cards/cash we were given. Josh has been wanting a Colin Kaepernick jersey for the baby to wear so that the two of them can cheer on the 49'ERS together this year all decked out in their gear. So of course I decided to take it a step further and for Father's Day bought Josh all sorts of 49'ERS stuff (including the baby jersey and a shirt of his own) to decorate the baby's bedroom with! We had decided on making the nursery into a little baby man-cave with all of our favorite teams and their souvenirs. This means we need to make a trip to the University of Utah bookstore this summer because of course he is going to be a huge UTAH fan! Josh was soooooo excited (which made my day) and he can't wait for our house to be finished so we can decorate! Basically this kid is going to like sports whether he wants to or not hahaha.

   

PS. I just had my weekly OB checkup and the doctor said the baby is still pretty high, so it doesn't look like he will be coming any time soon, but better luck next time :(. I am going to die if I am like my Mom and end up going 2 weeks overdue without even dilating!!