I Have This Friend

 

I have this friend;

she is very special to me.

Not just because of what she does,

but because of who she is.

 

Her eyes are the pale blue color of the sky when there is a hint of rain.

Her face shows the trace of childhood freckles; a reminder of her innocent heart.

I used to love watching the curls of her hair blow in the wind,

and would inhale deeply the scent of her sweet-smelling shampoo.

 

My friend doesn't know she is beautiful,

for the mirror of Narcissus ne'er has she reached.

She has always been unique in that way.

Compliments don't have the same meaning to her as to the rest of us

because of the demons she battles inside.

It is tragic.

 

My friend never lost her childlike mind.

It is her most pure and singular attribute.

When she plays on the floor with my son,

they are like two compatriots bonded together by their own irreproachable land.

She helped me build a tepee once,

and told me I was Pocahontas in the old world.

Everything was a game back then,

and she was the best game-maker.

 

My friend is the greatest listener

but rarely feels safe enough to talk about herself.

I feel sad when I think about her past

and how its steely threads have dictated the way she regards her own identity.

She doesn't know this.

 

My friend is the most beautiful in the color orange.

Its uplifting hues radiate her warm and inviting spirit.
Her cheerful demeanor is always a comfort,
and her advice is always loving and inspiring. 

My friend was blessed with the Christ-like quality of charity.
She often gives without a second thought.
Growing up I always took advantage of this,
for I knew no matter how much I took
she would just keep giving.

My friend is famous for taking in orphans
no matter what form they come in.
She has helped raise dozens of children and random animals
who were simply in need of the kind of sympathetic love only she could give.
She reminds me of Pollyanna.

My friend and I are so different.
Oh how many battles there have been!
But no matter the hurt I inflicted upon her,
I always knew she loved me.
How often do we get so lucky?

My friend is the sole owner of my existence.
Through her struggle to bring me life,
her strength and bravery never waned.
She is my hero.

God gave me the greatest blessing the day he paired us together,
because my friend is not just my friend.
She is my Mother.


-Ashly Nicol



HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY MOMMA! May this day be as beautiful as you are.

 

 

 

My First True Mother's Day

I can't tell you how lucky I feel to be the Mom of this little family

I celebrated last Mother's Day as a pregnant mother with my first baby and I thought that was fun and rewarding. However, celebrating this year with my first born in my arms was something new and special all in itself. Plus, Josh spoiled the heck out of me (as always) and made me feel like a beloved queen. Thank you baby, you are amazing :).

My special weekend started on Friday with Josh bringing home beautiful roses, chocolate, and an energy drink.

He knows me so well!!

On Saturday morning I headed out to the spa for some serious pampering! Josh had bought me a gift certificate for a full spa day that included a 60 minute massage, 60 minute facial, and a pedicure. LOVE LOVE LOVE HIM!!! I left there feeling so relaxed and extremely happy :).

Waiting for my facial and eating chocolate truffles :)

It was my first experience with a male masseuse and at first I was really nervous but it ended up being the best massage I've ever had! 

pretty toes :)

Sunday (actual Mother's Day) started early with a happy baby who doesn't like to sleep and a trip to IHOP for breakfast. My mom had sent a gift card and we made good use of it. Thanks Mom! The food was yummy and the waiter was sweet and brought me a carnation. Austin was even good the whole time and didn't cause a scene! I felt like I'd hit the jackpot!

Showing Austin my flower. We are still working on the whole smelling flowers and not tearing them to pieces thing.

Austin loves water but hasn't figured out how to suck it out of a straw yet so this is how we do it. Those cheeks! I just want to squeeze them!

Then we went home and tried taking a nap before church. I am not a nap person. I have the hardest time turning off my brain when I know it is day time and I should be doing something. So basically I laid there cuddled up to my hubby and thought about things. I thought about life and how grateful I am for my two boys. And yes, I consider them both boys. I thought about how much we have gone through together over the past few years and how each year has been so different. Not better, not worse, just different. This is our first year as parents and it has been such an amazing journey so far. Although he makes even the most simple things complicated, I can't imagine my life without my sweet baby. I can't imagine going a day without being able to pick him up out of his crib and squeezing him, or chewing on those chubby cheeks that I just can't get enough of. I can't imagine a whole day of not hearing Mama Mama Mama, or a day of not hearing his excited squeals. He is my world and I hope he knows how much he is loved.

Pretty soon it was time to get ready for church. I never get to go to relief society because it always interferes with Austin's nap time so we took two cars this time and Josh took him home after Sunday school so I could enjoy my day with the women. Austin surprised us with how well he did both hours and church was actually enjoyable this time :). During sacrament all the men got up and sang a song to the women. It was beautiful and it even made me tear up a little as I watched those big strong men, some holding sleeping babies, showing their soft side in front of everyone for their wives. The spirit was so strong and I felt so loved by my family, my ward family, and by God.

My loves

Thank you Austin for making me a Mommy

I came home from church to a "home cooked" meal of nachos and stir fry :). Josh was so excited to show me that he had cooked, even though it was a very interesting combination. I love that man. His boyish charm is always making me laugh. We finished off our night with a walk around the neighborhood as the sun was setting and I found myself thanking God for the beautiful life he has created for me. With all of the self reflection, love, and service that I have experienced, I honestly think Mother's Day might just be the greatest day of the year.

Happiness Is

 

Happiness is...

 

 

Watching a baby sleep



 

 

Going to the Library to find a good book to read, and then getting the stink-eye from your son when he sees that it is a love story ;).

 

 

 

Finding a Farmer's Market across the street from the Library!

 

 

 

Enjoying the sunshine and splitting a homemade pretzel roll with your little man at the Farmer's Market

 

 

 

Watching your baby enjoy the taste of fresh sugar-snap peas.

 

 

 

Heading home with a little bit of heaven: homemade hummus, a peach, nectarines, sugar-snap peas, a delicious pretzel roll, and some peanut brittle. Yummy :).

 

 

 

Putting the babes down for a nap and making chocolate Reese's peanut butter cookies to enjoy over Mother's Day weekend.

 

 

 

Knowing that it is Friday and in about two hours Daddy is coming home to be with us for the whole weekend! :) :) :) :)

 

 

 

 

 



Story of My Life

It seems like every time I try and start up a regular exercise routine, the universe turns against me! Last night was the perfect example. It was the perfect night! We took a family walk, gave Austin a bath, and had him to bed by 8:00pm. Then Josh and I got ready for bed and read out of the Ensign and had a nice little discussion about our readings. Josh had to be up abnormally early the next morning and I planned on going to the gym really early so we both were asleep by 9:00pm. Then, at exactly 10:30, Austin woke up screaming and the drama began. At first it was just me that got up with him since I am the one with the plumbing to get him to go back to sleep relatively fast. However, tonight those tricks weren't working. He was in pain. I'm pretty sure it was his stomach but I just couldn't tell with all the screaming and moving he was doing. He refused to nurse so I started wondering if it was his teeth? Or maybe he bit his lip? Or his tongue? It was all so confusing and so stressful and I was trying so hard to keep him quiet so Josh could get some sleep.

After an hour of that, it became apparent that there was nothing I could do and I put him back in his crib and figured he is probably just overly tired and needs to cry it out? Wrong again... After what felt like eternity of laying there listening to him scream, I got up again and went for round two. This lead to the same events as round one. So after a second struggle, back into his crib he went and this time I called for back up. Josh came in and gave Austin a blessing and held him which worked like a charm! He had stopped crying and was content to let his Daddy hold him and rub his back. Now the trick was getting him to fall asleep like that, which just wasn't going to happen. He was too worked up and now he was definitely overly tired. Then, out of nowhere, our teenage next door neighbor decided to add to the situation by opening her window and belting out a Kelly Clarkson song as loud as she possibly could! SERIOUSLY???!!!! I could have killed someone in that moment, I'm so not kidding.... So what did I do? I did what every unrested, stressed out Mom would have done. I opened up my son's bedroom window and yelled at her! I mean, seriously, out of all the stupid annoying songs she could have sung like a cracked out crazy person from her bedroom window, did it have to be BREAKAWAY?!!!  Go "spread your wings and learn how to fly" somewhere else you psycho!!

She stopped. It's a good thing too because I was in no mood to be messed with. We laid Austin down a few more times and even tried putting him in our bed with us but to no avail. It basically came to the point where he was just really needing sleep more than anything and by now it was past midnight. So we gave him some infant's Tylenol and put the poor guy to bed for a final time. He screamed for a while and then finally gave in to slumber!

The next thing I know, it is 5:30am and Josh is getting up for work. We are both exhausted. I feel so bad for him because I will have it rough at the gym, but he will have it rough trying to think at work. What a crazy night!

So now I have the decision of lounging around the house and recovering from last nights adventure, or getting my butt up, my caffeine on, and running those 5 miles I had in mind 24 hours ago. 

Don't worry, I made the right choice! We recently discovered the gym daycare and it has been a lifesaver! Now Mom can run out her frustrations and baby can make some new friends! Everybody wins :).

The 9am Thoughts of a Housewife

Being a Mom is a crazy good time. Is it rewarding? Yes! Is it what I'm used to? No. Do I love it nonetheless? Absolutely. I love that instead of money I am rewarded by slobbery kisses. Except for last night..... that kiss involved a bite that left my lip bleeding and when I yelled "ouch!" he looked behind him like I must have been talking to someone else! So then of course I started laughing.....silly baby.

 

Being a Mom also makes you think crazy things. It's like my brain is on overdrive ALL...THE...TIME. Here's just a few thoughts from this lovely morning:

 

1) Where's the caffeine??? This is the first thought that pops in my head at around 6'ish in the morning when Josh's alarm goes off and I am instantly engaged in going over "the list" for today. Yes, it's an actual list. It started off as a list in my head but then I realized I am no longer capable of remembering things with all the sleep deprivation that has gone on this past year so it is now a list I keep on my iPhone.

 

2) How fast can I get ready before the little songbird in the room across the hall starts squawking instead of singing? Well, that depends on if I actually plan on leaving the house today. If the answer is yes, then I usually  jump out of bed and let the race-pit style of hair and makeup begin. If no, then out come the yoga pants and not so lovely headband or ponytail....sometimes both.

 

3) Will he be poopy? Oh gosh, I hope not. Changing Austin's poopy diapers is seriously a chore and not because it is disgusting, but because it is such a struggle! He can't sit still! I try so hard not to get poop on the carpet (we can't use the changing table anymore because it is too dangerous) and of course I try not to get it all over myself. And then there's the baby powder. We usually end up inhaling more than we use. If only I had 1/10th of his energy!

 

4) Are all the electrical cords hidden, stairs blocked off, bathroom doors closed, remotes put up high, and wicker baskets covered with blankets? If not, all chaos ensues. Then again, he usually ends up finding them and getting past my "parental control" anyway so I don't know why I bother. For example, As I was cleaning up his breakfast mess, he found his way past my makeshift baby-gate and found his way up the stairs!

 

5) Should we go for a morning walk? Since we took a step outside and were almost knocked over by the wind, I decided against that one. Walking should be enjoyed, not endured.

 

6) Is it nap time yet? This one needs no explanation.

 

7) What should I do first when it IS nap time? This one's a little more difficult. Should I go over the list again and start working? Or should I enjoy my 2 hours of bliss and catch up on social networking while I watch my favorite morning show? Can you guess which one I chose today? I promise my house was clean just one hour ago!

MMmmm Keith Urban...

8) Exercise.... to be or not to be, that is the question. Tuesday nights I try and go to spin class but I have been skipping it all month because it is hard to leave when Josh gets home since we get such limited time together. I could always do insanity, but today that just sounds too insane. Biking sounds good, and later sounds even better ;).

 

9) Should I eat breakfast? The answer to that usually depends on the scale. This morning it read that I gained 2 pounds since yesterday... so I guess that answer is a big fat NO :(. 2 pounds in one day you ask? Yes, I promise it is possible. Eating is an art and I am the Master! Yet another reason to go to spin class tonight.

 

10) Why did I buy the generic tampons? These things suck! Since I quit my job, name brand is a luxury. However, there are some things you just don't skimp on and I knew the second I bought them I was going to regret it.... and I do :(.

 

11) Speaking of tampons, why did Aunt Flow show up when I am still breastfeeding? Not cool Mother Nature! I knew it was inevitable, but the past 17 months of not dealing with periods has been pure bliss and I was secretly hoping it would last forever!

 

12) Will I be strong enough today to stick to a healthy diet? Lately, I have been a total weakling and it doesn't help that we have a cupboard stocked full of Easter candy! I told myself yesterday that I should just eat it all and then it will be gone and I won't have to worry about it anymore lol! Now is the 2 pounds in one day making more sense? I have been struggling with the afternoon munchies and it is so not cool. Is it boredom? Is it the sudden energy crash that comes with the warmth of the afternoon sun? All I know is it needs to stop!

This made me laugh, it's so me!

13) What should I make for dinner tonight? I started off my stay at home Mommy career with meal plans and grocery lists which quickly dissipated because we never followed it anyway. Sometimes Josh gets off work by 4:30pm, other times it's not until 7:30pm. He never knows and he can never give me an accurate time frame to plan on. That makes planning meals difficult because I never know when to start the cooking process!

 

14) Should I clean something or is my house "clean enough?" That depends on who is spending the weekend with us (because there is ALWAYS someone) and is anyone coming over to visit? Two days ago I was doing stomach exercises and while I was planking I noticed my stomach was covered in Cheerio debris that must have come from the carpet! That was my cue to vacuum.

 

15) Should I return some phone calls or use that precious time to get stuff done? This is always a tough one because I want to stay in touch with friends and family, but his naps only last so long....

 

Speaking of naps only lasting so long, today it has been about 45 minutes since I put him down and he is now screaming. It looks like blogging is the only thing I am going to get done this morning. Thank goodness he takes two naps!

 

 



Easter Best Family Pics

Here's some of the family pictures we took on Austin's first Easter right before we headed to church. It's the only time all three of us are actually dressed up enough for a decent picture ;). Have I mentioned how much I LOVE MY FAMILY?!! Austin is getting so big, Josh just keeps getting more handsome, and I love them both more and more every day..... didn't think that was possible!

 

 

Easter 2014

Playing with his new Easter gifts. Of course everything goes straight into his mouth.

We did the traditional Easter of waking up and going downstairs to see what the Easter Bunny had brought, but this time we had a little one to make the whole scenario magical and new! Austin got all sorts of fun chew toys and bath toys since he chews on everything and bath time is his favorite time of day. That Easter Bunny sure is smart ;). He looked soooooooo adorable in his little bunny ears and we tried so hard to snap a picture of him wearing them but he absolutely hates things on his head and kept ripping them off as soon as we'd put them on him. We were lucky though and got a few good ones.



Austin feeling a little unsure about the bunny ear situation

He got his first experience with bubbles that morning which was a total hit! He was so in awe of them and wasn't sure if he wanted to touch them or just look at them float down onto his head.



lovin' the bubbles

And of course Mom and Dad got a basket of their own.... it wasn't supposed to be so grandiose and full of so much sugar but Dad went a little overboard as he always does :). The flowers were the perfect touch though. They make the room so happy!



Okay, now it's REALLY time to hit the gym!

We went to sacrament but Austin wasn't cooperating very well which was a tell tale sign of how the rest of our day was going to be. I think we wore him out at the family party the day before and he still hadn't recovered. We left after sacrament and met up with Grandma Helm and Sadie at the Conductor's Room at the Railroad Pass for a delicious Easter Dinner but sadly it was kind of a let down in a lot of ways :(. For one, Austin was being such a turkey and we all had our hands full trying to keep him quiet and entertained so we didn't bother the other people. Then, it took them 11/2 hours to bring out our food and by that time, Austin had had it! So to my dismay, I had to take him back to Grandma's house and try to put him down for a nap while everyone else got to enjoy their food. They were nice enough to bring home dessert for me though :). And of course Austin never took his nap! The second we walked through the doorway to Grandma's house he suddenly got his second wind and was all over the place! It was a whole new world to explore and he wasn't going to sleep through it!



Playing on the floor with Aunt Sadie. He is so in love with her!




He loved the toys Grandma had out for him, but wanted to get into the adult stuff more! I had my work cut out for me trying to keep him out of everything.




being the center of attention, as always




BUBBLES!! I love how chubby he looks here! hehe




And more bubbles :).

 Overall, Easter was fun but very tiring. Even though it was nice to see family, we were happy to go home and relax for a while. We took some pictures of our little family all dressed up in our Easter best on my nice camera but I haven't even looked at them yet so that will have to go onto the next post. Happy Easter!